Every now and then I meet someone and my heart opens. Whether compassionately or romantically, my heart opens and is flooded with warmth, fuzziness and general adoration.
I met someone recently with whom I shared this connection. There were beautiful conversations and shared values; common interests; and a language of love that flowed easily and freely. Wandering through beautiful places; magical kisses beneath a giant fig tree filled with glittering fairy lights; and that chemistry thing in spades. My heart sang and blossomed with the warm attention of feeling truly heard and seen. Reciprocity in action is a truly beautiful thing to admire and appreciate.
In spite of all this – it ended. I was ready to jump. She wanted to jump and was anchored by fear from past experiences. I feel as though this excerpt captures something of the break off quite perfectly.
“It’s okay to not be ready for love. It’s okay to leave, if you can’t hold it safe. It’s okay to acknowledge that you need to take your focus elsewhere. You have to be true to your own path. You have to go where you will grow. You can’t be where you aren’t wanting to be. But, one thing…please do it in the way that is most gentle. Do it in the way that is the most self-admitting. Do it in the way that you would want it done. It’s not the leaving of love that shatters hearts. It’s the lack of explanation. the lack of accountability, the lack of closure. Leave in the way that you would want to be left- with dignity and a heartfelt respect for the one left behind. Let them know, truthfully and to the best of your understanding, why you have to leave. Speak your truth with courage, even if it hurts. That step alone will transform your inner world. That step alone will support their healing. That step alone will prepare you to love, when the moment is right.” – Jeff Brown
Alongside grieving the loss of possibility to see this connection grow and bloom, I am also grateful. Grateful to have met someone I could connect with in such a deep way. Grateful to have shared such warmth and compassion. Grateful for the openness, honesty, communication, and self-awareness threaded through the entirety of the connection. And grateful to have been left in a way that was true, honest, accountable and respectful.
I am so grateful to know that there are people out there who are willing and able to form compassionate and conscious relationships. Relationships based on being aware of the self, and being whole in ones self before entering in to a connection with another. Recognising the needs of the individuals as well as the connection between.
Thank you to this incredible soul for proving to me that the love connection I seek is possible and truly does exist 💕